Revisiting Dax

Funny how at times we don’t get into a show when it originally airs but then later on find psychological tidbits we can take from it. The Voyager I was most into was Voyager and I also enjoyed the recent Treks including Prosigy. I was watching DS9 and this is when Ezri Dax comes into the picture. There is a symbiont that is given a host body, and when that host body dies it receives. a new one with all the memories of the previous lives lived in those host bodies. For Worf who was married to Jadzia Dax, is now faced with Ezri having all the memories. She’s Jadzia Dax, yet she isn’t, she’s Ezri. It got me thinking.

In a sense aren’t we all Dax and don’t our relationships in a way mirror the Dax journey? In life we go through the various stages childhood, teen, young adult, adult, senior. If we have made the journey wisely we have learned a lot and gained wisdom, maturity, even if sometimes we may slip back into immature behavior. Yet, when we are teens all that we were in our childhood doesn’t go away, it has imprinted us, and so it is when we are young adults etc…We don’t lose all that we were just because we’ve entered a new arc age wise. Sometimes there may be an incarnation that we are not too thrilled to recall because of choices made. In one episode there is a murderer on DS9 and Ezri calls in one of the hosts that was not the most ethical to be able to get into the mind of the killer and find out who he or she is. Dax represents all of us in that journey of various stages of our lives as we change, but not totally leave behind the former years etc…

What about relationships? Again if you enter into a relationship and neither of you grow as a team or only one of you grows then the relationship can’t likely survive. The journey of Dax and Worf is the journey of many of us, and also in the sense that sometimes when we grow the other person whether a partner, parent etc…doesn’t know how to manage the growth, the change. That relationship taught us about the need to open up lines of communication for there to be growth. It only improves with them when they truly communicate what is in their heart. Yes it’s scary, but they need to clear the air. Differences matter, but don’t need to be destructive, not unless it’s something truly major that just can’t be worked through. There is also adaptability, even in the parent-child dynamic because as the child becomes a teen etc… the dynamics can’t remain the same, not healthy. There is always adaptability needed when we are dealing with any form of relationship or it won’t work. There has to be a commitment to growing as a team, to learning about each other and self through that journey. Let me quantify that to say that no one should adapt to be mistreated on any level, ever. With that commitment there is the possibility of understanding, of growing, learning, making memories. Again if the differences are deep and multiple and deep it may not be possible, but barring that and mistreatment Dax and Worf offer insight. Ezri had to learn to stand up for herself more, be a bit like Jadzia, and Worf had to let go a bit of that Klingon warrior stubborn streak. Give and Take.

Another relationship I thought of a lot is Janeway and Chakoay. What about these two? They developed a trust that was awesome, but what made that trust happen? For one, both were invested in the well being of the team, not just self. They were open to hearing the other’s critique and advice, keeping in mind that criticism and criticism are different. One seeks to bring understanding and elevation the other the opposite. They also as a team made it it clear they would not cower to bullies nor accept bullies. They had each other’s back, yet also had lines they wouldn’t cross in that relationship, boundaries. They also recognized each other’s strengths and flaws, but understood that both made themselves and the other who they were. They also sought to improve themselves spiritually, intellectually and accepted that as human beings they would make mistakes, hopefully not many and not the same ones over and over.

Different TV shows when well written can teach us valuable lessons and if a show achieves that while entertaining us then they aced it.